Monday, June 26, 2017

Grace... Cancer Journey Part 5

Sometimes life is crazy and just throws you curve balls every which way.  Other times you start to realize that those curve balls are given to you to make you stronger and to help you realize all that you have good in your life.  I think one of those curve balls in my life is this cancer.  I am trying to put my trust in the Lord and endure this trial the best I can and also learn what I can from it.  I am coming to realize that sometimes our trials are blessings in disguise.  It is really crazy that I have to go through this trial to help me realize all the great people in my life that love and care for me.  I think that is one of the things I am meant to learn through this trial.  I know I am only maybe half way through and the worst is yet to come but I want to put into writing some of the blessings I have received from this trial.

I recently read an amazing book called, The Christ-Centered Home.  It is a great book and I would recommend it to everyone.  In the book it talks about how to have a better Christ-centered home and how to recognize Christ's hand in your life.  One statement in the book really stood out to me.  It said, "Grace (of God) are the times when the ordinary details of life are orchestrated in such a way that you  are reminded heaven has not forgotten you."  There have been many instances in this cancer journey so far that I have been reminded that heaven has not forgotten me.  There are times that I get down and start feeling sorry for myself but then something will happen that makes me realize that I am not alone in this.  Heavenly Father is aware of my needs and sends blessings when I need them.  It is always in the little things that I see this.

Little things like a friend stopping me at church and saying out of the blue, "I know you are starting treatment next week, what time are you bringing your kids over?"  This really came as a shock and blessing because I didn't know what I was going to do with my kids while Russell and I were at the hospital all day.  She was totally fine with having the kids over all day and was especially excited to have Charlotte all day.  

Little things like another friend sending me a YouTube video of a song that helps them through hard times.  When I watched the video, I was in tears because it was exactly what I needed to hear at that time.  

Little things like a neighbor saying "We need to have a party before you start chemo so don't plan anything for Friday because we are going to the lake!"  This totally came out of the blue but we had a great time at the lake with some neighbors we normally wouldn't have hung out with.  We love the Wood's now and had a great time getting to know them.

Little things like only having Stage I cancer and a very high survival rate.

Little things like friends bringing dinner and treats just to say we are thinking about you and hope you are doing well.

Little things like getting a text from a friend in New Mexico saying she had been thinking about me and wondering if I was okay.  That was probably the hardest day I have had so far and it meant so much to me to have someone think about me.

Little things like having a bishop in tune with the Spirit enough to give me the perfect scriptures and conference talks to read and listen to.  

Little things like having the Stake President call on a random Saturday morning and say I have been thinking about your family can I come by today and visit with you?  This really came as a shock because I had no idea the Stake President even knew what was going on.  We had a great visit with him and a general authority, Elder Nattress of the Seventy.  This was also a surprise but it was a great blessing.  Elder Nattress told us about his wife and her battle with cancer too and that another woman with cancer helped them out and gave them hope to make it through.  He told me that I would be okay and I would be a blessing and help to other cancer patients.  This was a great visit and exactly what I needed.  It really let me know that Heavenly Father was watching over me and my family.  

Little things like receiving a letter in the mail.  A few weeks after our visit with President Acevedo and Elder Nattress, I got a letter in the mail from Elder Nattress.  He thanked us for letting him come visit with us.  (We really should have been thanking him!)  His letter was very uplifting and one line really stood out to me.  He said, "Sister Farnsworth, the Lord is ever mindful of you and His angels will bear you up as you face this trial and experience."  This really touched me and gave me hope as I face this next phase of this cancer journey, Chemotherapy.  

Heaven has not forgotten me or my family.  The little things are evident of that.

June 9th was National Cancer Survivors Day here in Cache Valley. 
I don't know if I am considered a Cancer Survivor just yet but I am surviving cancer so far.  This was a fun night but I kind of felt bad being there because I have not gone through chemo or anything like the other people there had done.  But I guess I have been through a hard part of cancer, being diagnosed.  That was something we all had endured.  That night we listened to Desirae Ogden, a cancer survivor, tell her story.  She also gave each of us her book and I have loved reading her story.  I could not put it down because it was exactly the things that were going though my head as well.  Come to find out, Desirae is from Leeds and was one of Lacie's friends in school.  Small world.  Her story also gave me hope and was a blessing to read her story and get a better idea of what to expect from Chemo.
This journey has been one I never thought I would take but I will make it through one day at a time with the help of Russell and my kids.  These are the things worth living for and I love them!

To update on the healing process of  my incisions.  I went to the doctor on June 22 and Dr. Isom actually came and got me out of the waiting room.  He immediately asked how everything looked and I told him I thought it was healed and looked good.  He was relieved and said he had been losing sleep over me and hoping I was healing.  When he looked at the stitches, he said that yes everything looked great!  He took out the stitches and put sterile strips on it to help it heal completely. This has also been a blessing because we were really worried it would not heal and we would have to start over.  I am so happy we don't have to do that and I think Dr. Isom is glad about that too. He gave us the okay to start chemo finally.  So now we are onto the next scary step.  My first chemotherapy treatment is scheduled for July 10th.  So on we go with this cancer journey.

To be continued...

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